Lost and Life

My sister suggested I watch the show Lost beginning with season 1. I started it three days ago and cannot stop thinking about their characters problems, their lives before the plane crash, and analyzing how they are using their coping mechanisms to survive the situation they are in.
First of all I believe the creator and the writers of the show are brilliant. When I started watching the show I was thinking that each and every one of these people that survived the plane crash did so because they have demons within that need to be terminated, issues that need to be resolved, forgiveness that needs to be given to someone, and they need to come to the realization that their mistakes cost them a lot emotionally, mentally and financially, but that mistakes are a given, and they can move on. I believe whole heartedly that if you die before resolve your issues you are not free of them. We are all here to learn something.
I know this is just a television show. But to me it actually reflects real life. Think about if your plane crashed and you had to survive on a deserted island with forty eight strangers. I know exactly what I would do. It wouldn't phase me. I would briefly be angry that it happened, but I would survive. On the show you can see the leaders emerge. When you get a glimpse into their backgrounds you can see why these individuals are the way they are. Some are hostile, sad, weak, pessimistic, while others are optimistic, strong, and nurturing. What are you?
I love the show so much because it makes me realize the show is replicating life, only on a deserted island. We all deal with strangers and acquaintances all the time. I know I wonder why they are angry, mean, sad or weak. Most of the time I am caring, giving and understanding, but at times when I don't know what is going on in their personal life and I am being treated badly I become, short, mean, and sarcastic. How unfair of me or anyone else that doesn't step back and realize this person's grief has nothing to do with you or me, they are having internal churnings that disabled their functioning button momentarily. That leads me to my next point.
None of us know what is going on in someone else's life. We need to be patient, calm and polite with those we know and don't know. I believe that their is something wrong in every body's life that you encounter at any given moment. Their problem might seem small to you, but it is extraordinarily large to them.
Recently my old neighbor lost his thirty seven year old wife to breast cancer. She died within four months of her diagnosis. Her husband never told anyone. His wife laid in her bed on pain medications for four months, died and no one knew. What if I had run into the husband at the grocery store and he didn't say hello. Or what if he was very short with me in a conversation. Now imagine if I had treated him with anger and rudeness. People, life is hard, life is not perfect for anyone. We all have barriers to break through, remember that.
I am excited to see where this show takes these people and how they resolve their inner turmoil. I believe being stranded on a deserted island alone with our problems could really put what is important in life into perspective.

Can you be in love with TWO people at the same time?

My girlfriend text me the other day asking me if I thought a person can be in love with two people at the same time. As you could imagine the texts were long and too many to count. You ask why didn't you pick up the phone? My friend was training a client, so there was three women involved in the conversation. It was basically, them against me! I have an opinion, you might not agree with it, but here it is.
I do not believe that a person can be in love with two people at the same time. Being in love involves passion, romance (in the beginning and hopefully through out the relationship) unconditional love, empathy, forgiveness and an ability to compromise and be a partner with someone in life.
As humans we don't all have the ability to easily forgive, comprise, or share our life with someone else. Most of us only know what unconditional love is through our children. If you love your spouse or partner with unconditional love you are very lucky to have found that while walking the earth in flesh and blood.
When you are in love with someone whenever you see them you get a smile on your face, or when they are gone there is an aching in your body for them that can't be taken away by tylenol or advil. Only that person can take away the pain inside you with their presence. You can't imagine your life without them. How would you go on?
Being in love with someone is fierce and dangerous. I say dangerous because a person becomes vulnerable. As a woman who has not let many people in due to loss in my life, being vulnerable means I am standing at the edge of a cliff with only one toe stopping me from falling over. I am in love with one man, Mark, I didn't let him in until the age of thirty five, I am now thirty nine. I have never felt such loyalty and protectiveness towards a man. Let me tell you, at times my love for him has caused me great anxiety. You ask why? What if he died? What if he disappointed me? I would not handle it well. For he has my heart, my mind, my body and my soul in his possession. No one has ever attained the ability to even take one of those important aspects of who I am away from me. I gave them to him with trust. It was not easy for me to take a plunge into the unknown sea. These are truly unchartered waters for me. I am making my way, charting my course, but at times, with many storms brewing above and churning inside of me. There are times where I pull back because I feel way too anxious, and I would rather end something than have my insides ripped out again due to disappointment or death!
How could someone be in love with two people at the same time and go through all of that? I know, I am not normal. But my God, I can tell you if I would be dead from a heart attack if I was having to feel all those feelings twice over!
I did say I believe it is possible to be in love with one person and love another. I am in love with Mark, but I love my ex-husband. My ex-husband and I share children and had ten years together. How could I not love him? Being in love is a different experience. It is extraordinary and scary.
Maybe I am wrong or I maybe I am right. Love is a funny thing. It can blind you and paralyze you. Those are two things we can't imagine happening to ourselves in life. But we welcome them when we find love!
My father was in love with my mother. He loved her with all his heart. The day she died, my father had to go down to the local hospital and ID her. He came home to his three little children, told us your mother will never come home again, she in a place called heaven. That day my father's heart broke in two and has never been mended. He has never fallen in love again. He cannot say my mother's name, Bonnie, without tears welling up in his eyes. That was thirty six years ago.
When he talks about my mother I stare at him. I watch his eyes and his lips. The love he felt for her was great and filled his soul with joy. A huge piece of him left him the day she died. I believe watching him and his pain for years was a part of the reason I never let love in. I didn't want to go through hell on earth if I lost the one I loved with such intensity.
I finally let love in because I finally learned what life is about.