The Blue Bird

On December 28, 2008 I wrote a blog about the Chicago Bears losing to the Minnesota Vikings. Before the loss happened, I had mentioned that I had seen a red bird when I opened my front door in the previous blog. I have never seen a red bird, except in a book, and I was very excited. I said that maybe that meant the Bears would win or I would simply have a marvelous day.
The Bears lost, but my day was fantastic. At the end of my blog about the Bears losing I mentioned that maybe I will see a blue bird tomorrow. I have only seen a blue bird one other time, in Chicago, 25 years ago, and I really wanted to see one again. I was anticipating that I would see the blue bird when I opened my front door that next morning. The blue bird wasn't there. I thought to myself, "Heather, today is not the day that God is going to let you see the blue bird. It will happen another day."
You must know that I relfect on life a lot. I do not believe anything is a coincidence and I always take the good out of the bad. I stop and see the signs all around me that God is putting in my path. We all get those signs, some of us are just too busy to look for them, and some are still too jaded to recognize them. I was jaded for a long time, and never saw the signs that God gave me to tell me I was on the right path or the wrong path or to let me know every thing would be ok.
As you know, I am no longer too busy, or jaded anymore to not recognize the wonderful little gifts God gives me now and then. I should start sharing all my little gifts I receive to help people realize they are not alone and are being guided with divine intervention, but you all might think I am crazy. So, I am going to share this one, about the blue bird that I wanted to see and hadn't yet.
Remember, I wrote about the blue bird on December 28, 2008. Last Saturday, January 17, 2009 I was having a rough afternoon. Sometimes, I just wallow in self pity. I usually give myself twenty minutes to do it. I actually time it, and after twenty minutes I think about what was bothering me or making me sad and then I think about happy memories. I start to insert happy thoughts into the bad thoughts I might be having. I start to think about people in the world that have it much worse than me, and believe me, someone always has it worse than you. Then I bring closure to my problem, stand up, thank God for who I am, what I am, and all my gifts, and move on.
This past Saturday, twenty minutes passed, but I just couldn't stop missing my mother. My mother has been dead for thirty six years, I am thirty nine, and I still wish I had a mother. But 93% of the time I do not dwell on it. For I know, I was not meant to have a mother. More on that later. So, on this day, for some reason, I couldn't shake wanting a hug from her.
I was sitting in a park in Walnut Creek, Ca around 1:00 pm on a gorgeous Saturday silently crying. Tears were running down my face. I put my elbows on my knees, intertwined my fingertips, and rested my forehead on my closed fist and prayed. This is what I said, "Dear God, I miss my mom. I really feel lonely, and so badly wish I had a mom to call and get a hug from. I feel so alone. Somedays I don't want all the pressures I have. I love you God, and I love my mom, and could you please just give me a sign that everything will be ok. Mom could you let me know you are here?"
At that moment ladies and gentlemen, I looked up, and there a blue bird flew right in front of my face and landed in the tree fifty feet in front of me. You are not alone, life is good, you are great, and remember, someone is always with you!